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Well, today ended up being a cheat day. Hubby and I really needed to spend a bit of time just the two of us, so Katie spent a couple of hours with her grandparents. We walked one of our favorite downtown locales and stopped at Whole Paycheck – oops, I mean Whole Foods – to pick up a few things. I was pretty ravenous by the time we reached our destination and battling the happy food emotions that always accompany our outings. Grabbing a coffee or chai tea and food has been central to our outings for nine years. No way we’re going to be able to drop the routine cold turkey. We’ve got some work to do. I think I’ll work through my food issues and associations in another post. It’s turning out to be a doozy of an issue.

We ended up at a local favorite sandwich shop of mine, Cosi for those who know it. I went in fully expecting to use this as a learning experience. How do I feel eating it? Is it necessary for a good time with my hubby? Does it taste as good as my memory remembers? How do I feel after? Was it worth it? I learn lessons best by the act of doing. Also, my psychology background leads me to process issues in a way that works for me and allows me to make new associations that will lead to permanent changes. Blah blah blah. So I got my favorite sandwich and A COOKIE and was super excited. The little kid in my was grinning like it was Christmas morning. Light of mood. Buoyed. I took my first bite. Eh. It was ok. Half way through my nose was running from the honey mustard. Huh? That’s new. It seemed super spicy, even though I’m fine with things like raw garlic, fresh ground black peper, and hot chili sauce. The turkey, sauce, brie, and bread (fresh baked flatbread) began the ‘brick’ phase of digestion even before I finished the sandwich. I almost didn’t finish it. I swear I can still feel it sitting like a rock six hours later, though it luckily didn’t cause any digestive issues. I then proceeded to the chocolate chunk cookie. The dough tasted heavenly when I first touched my tongue to it. I should have just licked it and stayed happy. After the first two bites I didn’t feel the need for it anymore though I had to finish it. As a sugar addict, you don’t throw out sugar especially when you are denying yourself of it and only have this one chance.

I FELT CRUMMY. We both did.
I felt weird like I was having an adrenaline rush. My heart was racing. My face was red. We briskly walked the street of downtown – led by usually poky little me with my short legs -, but I didn’t feel any better. By the time we got back into my truck, I was so tired that I just wanted to curl up and sleep but still felt the body racing. Hubby checked his blood sugar as soon as we got back to his parent’s house and it was 263. Dangerously, can-cause-damage high. His diabetes has been well controlled with diet recently, but this is our first real experiment with ‘bad’ foods. [He is going to Italy very soon to visit his family (he’s first generation American), so I wanted to test what will happen when he goes off the diet for pizza. Not having it is not an option. Honestly, I totally understand.] This drastic sugar spike was unexpected. Another walk after dinner (really a stroll since miss Katie came) gave him another opportunity to drop it a bit before we headed home. A funny premonition had me checking my blood sugar levels even though I tend toward the hypoglycemic end. 162 FOUR hours after we finished eating! It should have been below 100. No wonder I felt so sick. I did some sprints on the stairs because I like what this article says “high-intensity training is superior to chronic cardio because it produces a greater stimulus and thus more effectively empties the muscles and liver of glucose.” The quick sprints didn’t feel like enough so I did a set of squats, standing push ups, and some shadow kick boxing for a few minutes. I definitely felt better after that and my glucose was down to 126 within half an hour of the first test. Hubby was on his way back to safe levels after one of these diabetic supplements. Water has also been my constant companion for the last couple of hours, plus an evening dose of probiotic. I’m having trouble spelling and specific words I want to write are hard to grasp from a bit of brain cloudiness. Now that is incentive to stay away from my trigger foods. Let’s see how this gets processed and fits in with my deep seated associations of food, comfort, and happiness. 
Anyone else feel like they have someone else’s body while on GAPS???
Mine is freaking out in the strangest ways. Those funky spots on the underside of my hands. A hive showing up next to my eye after mopping today (must have been nuts or dairy being released through my skin while sweating). My face had been red and patchy from yeast overgrowth from my first cheat after intro, sometimes itchy. Yeast infections in unmentionable places if I take an epsom salt bath. Ugh. 
Tomorrow? Broth, broth, broth. The beef broth of knuckle, oxtails, and horizontal cut marrow bones has been in the crockpot with Celtic sea salt (we’re not having vinegar with Katie’s ferment sensitivity) and should be done by tomorrow evening. We’ll finish the chicken broth in the morning and another batch is going on the stove after breakfast for lunch. Some healing is in order for this poor beat up body. 

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